Dear You...

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I was at jurong safra for a parents' day lunch when ms tnee broke the news of the upcoming musical production. The drama club whatsapp group was continuously buzzing with messages going back and forth displays of excitement and the introduction of the storyline. The thing about whatsapp groups is that you miss quite a lot of valuable information if you are to be mia when everyone else isn't which was the case for many on 25th May 2013. That resulted in me coming up with the summary of Dear You 2014 (v 1.0)

 fig 1.1

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West Side Story back in 2012 was our first taste of being part of a big scale school production and with news of the new production, we were definitely hungry to be on stage once again. The disappointment of the SYF results was (are) perhaps still lingering in me when word of auditions came round so I went a bit nuts. If it isn't obvious enough, I'm not one to deal well with sadness and anxiety at the same time. However the advantage of being part of the drama is that you involuntarily have to audition which means there's no need for the '5 seconds of insane courage' to pick up an audition form. Half the battle won? 

There were the pre-audition auditions where ms tnee took a couple of sessions to assign singing roles. We were meant to learn 'Part of Your World' and 'A Time for Us' but I was caught up with speech day rehearsals, or at least that was my excuse, so I sang When I'm Gone aka THE CUP SONG. I am such a loser, really.

Proper auditions came by and my worst fear was met. It was a saturday in july and 'Part of Your World' came back to haunt me. Zhe ern, annabel and I were made to sing it in front of the teachers and alumni numerous times and I remember so because I surpassed the normal quota of nervous laughter allowed for a single audition. Later on after all the singing, we were handed a script and asked to act out what is now known as the most emo scene in the whole story and I performed what you would call the exact opposite of nailing it.

Following auditions, two A3 sized papers were pasted on the wall outside the staffroom. There were two columns on each page. One with the characters name and the other with the actor who was awarded the role.

The waiting period for the role assignments was really unbelievable. Every time I went and saw my name absent from the list I wanted to rip my hair out. Originally I had a character in mind I wished for myself to be partnered with but gradually my hopes had simmered to a 'I hope I even get a role'. We rushed up everyday after recess to see whether our names were written in glorious permanent form. A couple of weeks later, my name was up.

Elizabeth.

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Trainings with mr mitch until the actual script came out were actually pretty stagnant. We were focused on adjusting our bodies and minds to be akin to those of stage performers. These technical nitty gritties were definitely important in building our foundations but do you really want me to recount on how at the beginning of each session, we spent 10 minutes in silence doing routinely warm-ups. I guessed not.

So let us fast forward all the way to the week just prior to show day. YES.

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We had a break during our mid-year exams but straight after our marking days we were back in action with rehearsals 6 days a week. I wouldn't say I'm exaggerating because that is the truth but it isn't as harsh as it sounds because really, I was having the time of my life. I loved the fact that I could focus on being in the ava and dance room soaking in the glory of being part of a musical.

The chinese Os papers were a day before show day (also bump-in day) so from monday the 26th of may to friday the 30th, it was about three hours of chinese classes in the morning followed by normal class timetable before a quick lunch and four hour rehearsals. 8am-7pm. It wasn't anything more than exhaustion that killed me though and actually, I felt calm and happy all the way till well...0730 on 2nd june aka an hour before exam hall hell.

Once the papers were over at 1245 though, us sec fours and fives took off to UCC in two 5-seater cars. There were 12 students and 2 teachers who were driving so if you do the math, it was 7 people crammed into each of the cars. Sure wasn't the most comfortable ride but who needs comfort when you've got great company? (:

: bump-in
Was rushed off to have lunch and change into costume before quick hair and make-up. I'm really sorry and embarrassed to say this but I was expecting somebody to do me up HAHAHA instead only charlyn helped me and she did an amazing job on my eye brows! I shall mention fatin too since she helped to bitchify my hair but otherwise I relied on my youtube absorbed skills to do my eye liner/shadow/lipstick/foundation so thank you michelle phan, zoella & tanya burr.

Our first run on stage was a technical run meant for our crew to do striking and for the lighting designer to figure out what was best suited for each scene/transition! Following that we headed for dinner and before we knew it we were back on stage for another full run before ending at 10pm. My memory for this day is admittedly very cloudy because everything happened in a blur and what happened the next day totally overthrows this day so YAY LET'S TALK ABOUT SHOW DAY

:show day
The bus was meant to come fetch us at 0730 but it was no where in sight for a solid hour. This incident incurred the first of panic attacks. At least not for me since I went gaigai-ing around the school with my favourite melting clock and the school kitty appeared, decideing to let a few of us patronise it. 

When we reached UCC we waited around before the theatre doors opened. Got our backstage 'artiste' passes (much happiness and pride in this) and headed straight for the dressing rooms! In case anybody was wondering, on top of the vital woman undergarment that shields nipples, we wore tank tops followed by our musical tees aka our stamford high pe tees and finally our uniform shirt. So when you see my looking all frumpy on stage, please understand )': I was an urban eskimo.

Originally we were meant to have a full-run but there was no time for mic ups the previous day so full-run time was spent on organisation of mic switching. It was such a headache to go through and so many people were clearly distressed. Sometimes it seems as if no matter how prepared you think you are, these technical things can just come along and screw you up the ass. We still had to get ready for our afternoon show though so we went for lunch before we rehearsed the opening number twice. When we were done, it was time.

1400 - PRESET

Fatin and I duo-ed on 'Popular' which only cames later on during the opening number so my preset position was backstage. I was with shu qing and I was quite the wreck. I wasn't nervous but for some reason I was extremely emotional. When the 'Dear You' recordings started playing and I heard ms wong's message I nearly started crying but you know the thing girls do, they fan themselves to stop the tears from falling? Yeah I did that. 

Then before you know it, I'm on stage prancing around like the bitch Elizabeth is.

There isn't a way to describe how I was feeling throughout the entire run but I felt happy. It felt so good to finally be performing in front of an audience. I was proud to show off what we had been working on for so long. People see us around school in our dark blue and yellow tees and probably think that rehearsals are simply about singing. dancing and acting but we sure went through a hell load of shit to earn out 2 hours on stage.

The moment the curtains closed for our afternoon show, we ran out to the foyer area to say hello to our loyal fans hehehe so happy to have seen classmates and schoolmates who were so supportive of us. Cute little drama juniors said they were so excited to have seen us perform on stage and I told them that it would be their turn soon (: hope for the future.

15 minutes later we were back on stage for a debrief by mr mitch. It was rather unpleasant and I was pretty pissed off but there was no time to be grumpy since we were soon rushed off to have our dinner and touch up of make up!

Soon it was time for our night show prep talk and then, it was show time.

1830- PRESET

Everybody was so pumped that it was going to be the final run of Dear You. Everybody except me? To be honest, up till now I have no idea why my heart felt so heavy just moments before our night show. I wasn't bouncing about like everyone else was and all I wanted to do was be alone. Caught myself yawning numerous times while waiting for the audience to fill the seats and I kept telling myself "you better not fail now". The recordings were played again and this time it was ms tnee's messages that sent my eyes swelling. Do not ask me why I am so emotional. The curtains drew and the lights went up and in the blink of an eye, Dear You was over.

There is no way of phrasing my words to reflect my thoughts and emotions but now I feel empty.

But I'm also really really grateful and happy.

Dear all of you, thank you so much for everything you have thought me.
You guys are so precious.
You all have so much passion and heart even though it may not have showed all the time, I saw it.
Thank you all for being there for each other, caring for each other.
For all the the endurance, tolerance...
You guys deserve the world.

For those who missed out: Dear You 2014 (Night Show)